With the devastating end of a magical relationship I realize that I can either be sad about something that is over or move on and dive back into the dating pool. I figure this time why not go in head first. I rejoined Match.com and it has been a crazy 2 weeks. Part of me feels I should write a post for each guy but as there are so many I'm going to combine them all.
As I returned to Match I began with the usual emails which turn to texting which turns into 1st dates. I'm going on a new date almost every night. I can't complain as my social life has definitely taken a boost. There are plenty of guys I email but I want to focus on the ones I actually meet in person when it comes to sharing. We begin with Luke, a very pretty guy with a good job, lots of money and plenty of things to show for it. I enjoyed our date as a happy hour dinner and conversation. He was very easy to talk to and called me out, which was fun because it allowed me to be myself and not care what he thought. We had lots to talk about and figured that it had the potenial for another date in the future. Granted after that date he got a little weird, moody and slightly pervy which I thought took away from our fun time. But in other news I met up with him again 5 days after our first date as he wanted to introduce me to another guy he thought I might like. I will say I've never had a date try to pine me off to another person but you never know what new introductions can turn into. Also since meeting that guy, all conversation with Luke ended which I'll take as a not interested, which is ok because he was too flamboyant for my taste.
With that I'll lead into Ryan the guy Luke introduced me to at a random party in Portland. Ryan is a nice, fun guy with lots of hobbies/toys to enjoy. We went out on a real date a few days after being introduced. He's not a Match date so that made things different. Very relaxed, open guy who understands life is about improving, self awareness and working on being better. He was familiar with my religion so that makes things go a little easier. Again I enjoy going on dates where I feel there is no judgement and I can be open about myself and my life, good parts and bad. He shows definite interest and has already begun a list of things we can do together. I think he will make a fun, outgoing guy to spend time with.
Next is Karl the military guy, which is a first for me. We have now hung out three times. He texts me all day and we are in good contact. Our first date was great because we were able to talk as the next two dates have been more relax and cuddle, not talk. I'm worried we don't have a connection ecause without good conversation its hard to create a bond with someone. But I know he is interested in me and I'm open to seeing how things go.
Tonight I will be meeting Jon and we shall see what he is like.
I realize that with dating so many people so close together that I can't get too focused on one person which lets me be more relaxed in my thoughts. Because there is always a new person to look forward to that could have potential I can be myself and not get concerned with things that may happen in the future. Everything is very present and just a good time. I'm still struggling with the mindset of wanting to be in a committed relationship rather than dating. But I didn't get this experience in my 20s and there is no better time than the present to learn some new dating skills and learn about myself in the process.
I should mention that I still struggle with missing and wanting Kyle back in my life. He was a different kind of guy than anyone I've ever met and we were so much alike it gave us a strong connection from the start. All this dating is suppose to help me get past him, but sometimes I feel it just makes me want what we had even more as guys don't live up to him. Still going back and forth and trying to look beyond, that putting myself out there so strong will pay off in the end for me. I've given up my control and know that the universe will bring me what I want and the right one at that. I just have to be open for it.
For now I will have as many experiences as I can with dating, so watch out because here I come!
