As we start this new year I'm starting fresh. I'm no longer paying for my Match account so I cannot see profiles and emails, or respond. I did go on my first date of the new year. There is a single guy at church who is my same age, about a month ago I mentioned to him that we should hang out since we are in the same life situation (and no that is not the words I used lol). Well out of nowhere he called on Friday and asked if I wanted to go to lunch Saturday afternoon. I appreciated that he took the initiative and planned everything, then came and picked me up. He was a gentleman and opened all my doors and paid for lunch. We had a nice time talking and getting to know each other. But either I have suddenly become so out of practice or it was him. Regardless of who I am on a date with, whether I like them or not, we always manage to have a easy time chatting and such even if it is a one time thing. For some reason on this date it constantly felt awkward. I had to think of questions to ask and things to say and the flow of conversation was off. Had a nice time and I asked if he liked hiking and would be up to going sometime, to which he said yes, so there is a high chance we will hang out again. I just can't figure out what seemed off on this date. I did speak with a friend who knows him and was reassured that the awkwardness was most likely him. I will look past that and hope that he and I can be friends and hang out in the same way Jeff and I do. Am I interested beyond being friends, not really, but I would love to have a few guy friends I can have casual relationships with and can call up when an opportunity arrives.
While on this date I realized something else, I honestly hate dating. I have no interest in going out with new people and trying to see if you have enough in common, whether you like each other, or just work as friends. I have always enjoyed meeting new people and the experience it brings, but apparently this version of me is rather over the whole thing. True in the last few years I have put my best foot forward and dated like crazy. I think a long vacation from dating is in order. In fact going on a date made me realize I'm completely content and happy with the way my life is. In the past dating has made me feel lonely and realize I want and miss having someone in my life. But this last date I was even more happy of the life I had without someone. Hopefully that is not a bad thing, but unless someone comes into my life that really moves me, I'm perfectly good with continuing on with life as is. I did say in my last post that I was giving myself a two year pass before I start worrying about my single status and until then I just want to add in some more hobbies and social time and enjoy!
